Dating Tips for Men & Woman
- Politeness, courtesy, and common sense are the first steps toward a successful date.
- Give plenty of lead time when asking for and planning a date. People have busy schedules.
- Confirm the day before.
- If offered the choice – let your date know where you would like to go. People want to do the right thing. It takes the pressure off if you are specific about your likes (food, restaurants, etc.).
- Dress appropriately for the date. If you go to a nice restaurant or event, dressing up shows you put some extra thought into the date. However, don’t wear clothes that are uncomfortable – that could ruin your enjoyment. Wear clothes that reflect the real you but are still appropriate for the event and location.
- It may be easier to choose a familiar place where you know the environment, staff, menu, etc. – a favorite restaurant where you are comfortable. Being able to offer menu ideas and suggestions to your date can be a plus.
- Men – be considerate. Opening doors or pulling out your date’s chair may seem old fashioned – but it can make the person feel important and respected.
- Wherever you go, be considerate and polite to others – the staff, your server, etc. Your tone and treatment of other individuals is a reflection of you, your relationship style, and your communication skills. Wherever you go on the date, enjoy it – don’t get overly critical or picky. Critical behavior can make your date wonder how critical and picky you could be in a relationship.
- Pay attention to your date. Put the phone or text device away.
- Avoid meeting at a place where your attention is going to be drawn to a television, a game, or anything or anyone who is going to distract you from your date.
- Be a good listener. Show interest in the person. Find something complimentary to say.
- Discuss interesting and positive topics. Learning what your date is interested in is an important step to creating a healthy relationship. It’s nice for both people to be able to share thoughts and ideas – that’s part of being in a relationship. Don’t be afraid to share your beliefs and opinions, but you don’t need to start a debate. If you want a second date, it’s best to be diplomatic and respectful of your date’s beliefs and opinions. It shows you are open to learning and growing.
- People are attracted to others who are considerate, happy with life, and confident but not boastful.
- Be honest and authentic. If you are intent on building a relationship, then honesty is always the best policy. You can do this in a kind and respectful way – not by being blunt or confrontational.
- People do not want to hear about any past lover, partner, or spouse; or any negative stories and problems in your life. People who are complainers, needy, or whiny are not very attractive to most people.
- If you are enjoying the date, let the person know. Don’t assume he or she knows how you feel.
- Thank your date for a day or evening out. Be courteous.
- Don’t get too familiar too quickly. Suggesting trips, meeting relatives, and baby names could frighten or intimidate your date. Taking phone photos can also cause concern too early in a relationship.
- When communicating online during the dating process, keep it simple, sincere, and short. Email novels sent hourly may say that you have way too much time on your hands.
- A second date gives you the opportunity to show you were paying attention on the first date. Choose a place to meet that reflects something you learned about your date. If you were nervous or not as open as you wanted to be on the first date, relax and open up on the second date. Ask and learn and share new things about yourself.
- To Google or not to Google: You can learn a great deal about people on Google but remember, it’s only a search engine. There are many facts that can be learned about a person, but it doesn’t usually reveal whether or not the person is caring and compassionate with a strong, moral character. Some might consider it invasive, but most people will use Google. Your date may use it to find out more about you too. Do your research – but also trust your intuition and feelings.
